Innocence
by CyberSerpent
Summary: Based on Soujiro and Soujiro's song, Innocence. Sou-chan ponders about his past b4 his fight with the manslayer Battousai.


Disclaimer- I don't own anything in here, song or Soujiro (however much I want to) Emily Hu Normal Emily Hu 41 29 2001-10-21T02:33:00Z 2001-10-21T20:00:00Z 2 666 3798 . 31 7 4664 9.2720 110 

Disclaimer- I don't own anything in here, song or Soujiro (however much I want to)

A/n- my second tribute to Soujiro Seta, the cutest assassin ever!  (after Different Truths, which I like fairly well) the song here is Innocence from the Rurouni Kenshin Soundtrack (actually I downloaded the mp3 of it), and it's all in Japanese, gomen gomen!  (if you want the English version, either email me at DigimonGoddess@aol.com or go to www.animelyrics.com, click on R, then Rurouni Kenshin, then Innocence.

Innocence 

Soujiro fingered the sword's hilt and for once the ever-present smile was off his lips.  This sword was the sword that started it all, when he first saw Shishio-sama killing those cops, when he was given the sword, when he killed his stepfamily…

_Hora, abunai yo __Boku ni ima fureta nara kireru kara __Kimi wa mada __Boku yori mo tsuyoku nai _

_Wakaru yo ne_

Sometimes he thought maybe he shouldn't have killed them, maybe _he_ shouldhave died, because he was weak and worthless.

But other times he would feel so sure that it was right thing to kill them, because _they _were the ones who were weak and worthless.  

So, who was right and who was wrong?  Shishio-sama or the manslayer Battousai?

_Aoi honoo ga ima koori no naka de __Shizuka ni moete iru yo __Ah- Hohoemi wo ukabeta __Shounen ga hitori _

_Tooku ni mieru_

Flashbacking to that fateful night, he was just thinking about living on the way he was, weak and afraid.  But when he was so afraid, and the only things that seemed to be able to save him were Shishio-sama and that sword.  

So when he was frightened to the point of insanity, and the words "_The strong survive and the weak have to die" _repeating in his head over and over, were enough to persuade him to get up and run.  To run and run and run, to the sword.  He was gripping it tightly, so tightly, was it really going to save him?  Can he, the weak and afraid, turn on the strong?  Can he destroy the balance of nature?

_Yes._

The answer came swiftly and suddenly as he quickly got rid of the first victim.

Then the next.

And the next.

_Was this really right???_

_Kaze, itai ame, sakebi-goe, kireta ito, fuyu no sora __Boku wa naze waratte 'ru no? __Wakaranai _ Nakushita yo 

As he stood in the rain, splattered by blood, his hand was gripping that sword so tightly again…that sword dripping with blood and sin.  Will he ever be able to let go of that sword?  Will he?  Or will he continue to hold it forever, adding more and more sins onto himself?  _Will he???_

_Aoi honoo ga ima koori no naka de __Shizuka ni moete iru yo __Ah- Tatta hitotsu kiri no __Kotae wo boku wa _

_Shitte iru kara_

He was killing the people, and he thought it was right.  After all, they were the weak, right? And the weak deserve to die.  But was it really that horrible, being weak?

He was clutching the sword, and he was murdering his stepfamily, and he kept repeating to himself that he was right, he was strong, and they were wrong, they were weak.  But really, deep down inside, he didn't want to kill, he didn't want to kill his stepfamily.

Was it really that bad, being weak?

_Ki wo tsukete_

Perhaps Shishio-sama wasn't right after all, perhaps the Battousai was right.  Maybe you should _protect _the weak, _because _you are strong.  You should not kill the weak because you are the strong.  

But he didn't protect me when I needed him, did he?  I was weak and all alone, with nothing to shield me except Shishio-sama's reasoning and a sword.  Nothing else but that.  How was I to live if they weren't there when I needed them?

_Kimi wa yowai kara ne __Mou sugu boku ga _

_Keshite ageru yo Kitto_

But…maybe the Battousai, somehow, some way, _was _right.   Suppose he was, then how was he supposed to protect his stepfamily when all they did was abuse him?

Maybe if the Battousai had been in the same situation he did, he wouldn't say you had to protect the weak.  So many maybes…so little answers…

How am I ever going to find the answer if all there is are questions? 

Soujiro stood up and slid the sword back into its sheath.

There was no time to think about that now, his fight with the manslayer was coming up.

Yes, there was no time, no time at all.

_Ah- Aoi honoo ga ima koori no naka de _ Shizuka ni moeru 

A/n- okay, dats my little short tribute to Soujiro's thoughts before going off to fight Kenshin in the Kyoto-arc!  Well, at least, it's what I _think _he's thinking!  After all, I'm not Soujiro therefore I cant really fathom what he was thinking…so, anyway, see ya later maybe in some other fic!

Later dayz!

CyberSerpent .~


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